Friday, June 6, 2008

Odds or Evens?

Springtime in NYC, the time when a young men's thoughts turn to... thinking about insane allergies! I haven't been online for a few days because my allergies were kicking my ass. I feel a little better today so it's time to update the blog with yet another wacko I picked up this week.
Early in the night, about 6pm, when traffic is at it's near-worst in midtown, I picked up a seemingly normal human female in the meat-packing district, on 9th and 14th. She was around 40 years old and dressed normal, spoke normal and otherwise appeared mentally functional. She said hello very nicely and asked me to bring her to Madison and 66th. No problem! Nothing hard about that!

Or was there?

Just as I turn my meter on and about to drive she adds this: "But! I'm a little superstitious! We can only drive on even numbered streets! Odd numbers are bad luck!"
Fantastic. An OCD weirdo. Telling me I can't drive on odd numbered streets cuts all my options in half. But this wasn't the worst of it. She continued and said that name streets were bad too. Ok. Now I'm down to about 30% of the streets in Manhattan. Oh, and guess what! She doesn't like 6th avenue either because there is a 6 in "666." Are you kidding me?!?
So, if you're a not a New Yorker or familiar with the city, these next few paragraphs will mean nothing to you, but if you are, let me run this by you real quick. Can't cut to the east side through 14th because I can't go uptown on Madison (name street) Park (name street) 3rd or 1st (odd numbers) or the drive (name road), I can't go up 6th (666) or 8th (because 8th would bring me through Columbus Circle which is a name street. I told her it's impossible because 10th avenue becomes Amsterdam Ave which is a name street. She said it's OK because it's still really 10th avenue. Ok. So she has rules within this brain of hers. So I had to take 14th to 10th avenue ALL the way up to 86th! 65th is the Central Park Eastbound transverse and it's an odd number!! So I took 86th across and soon found myself on the east side with another problem. I can't go down 5th, Park or Lexington! Odd, name, name! So I went all the way to 2nd ave, down to 72nd and cut across to Madison. I pulled over and said: "Here we are. 72nd and Madison. The closest you can possibly get to 66th and Madison without dealing with the evil streets."

My meter was at $52.20. The normal meter for a trip from where I picked her up to the dropoff should not be more than $20. And she thanked me profusely! And tipped me well! She says that other cab drivers yell at her so she appreciated me going how she asked! I don't know why other cabbies wouldn't go that way.. I mean, if you want me to go the longest possible way I'd be happy to oblige. I'm adding keywords to all my stories to sort them out. File this one under WACKO.

There are 8 million stories in the Naked City. This has been one of them.